Me vs We

This article is from an email received from Scott (Five Streams Community)
http://www.fivestreams.co.za

Imagine two intersecting circles. The left circle represents “me” and right circle represents “we”. A community must have these two components.

Firstly, it requires that each family have the ability to be totally independent if they choose. This is the “me” circle. In the Ringing Cedars books, Anastasia advises that each family have a domain that is 1ha in size. Although we do not specifically follow Anastasia’s principles at Five Streams, we happily adopt this concept. Put simply, the idea of 1ha domains is sheer genius. 1ha is just big enough for a family to grow their own food, have a house or two, and not have to talk to anyone if they do not want to. But… it is also just small enough to allow community to develop naturally. You can walk to your neighbours, share with them and commune with them without having to pay toll fees.

On the other hand the “we” component is what is created on the shared space (the space not taken by domains). On Five Streams, we have a full time farm manager, Sid, who manages a team of staff, and it is their job to maintain the main house and equipment, develop the land, grow vegetables and fruit trees, look after the animals, etc. This is the right hand circle, the “we” and nobody is under any obligation to get involved. The “we” circle is NOT community. It is what is happening on the land that facilitates community. This is very hard for many people to grasp. Apart from the above undertaken by Sid and his staff, the “we” also includes building our pyramid, our labyrinth, the walks and turning the main house into a community centre. It includes all those real and tangible things that are developed for the community to use, but it is not the true essence of community.

Let me illustrate: have you ever been to a cluster estate with a pool, clubhouse and maybe even a gym? Yet nearly all the time, it stands empty? This is what you get when you develop the “we” (the infrastructure) without the “me” (happy independent people on domains who actively seek community). It is crazy. They build community facilities, but they design houses that do everything they can to ensure people’s privacy! They live like sardines and sardines can’t commune because they are too close together. (And, of course, they’re dead.)

What I’m trying to say is this: community cannot be forced. It arises naturally when the “me” and the “we” are in balance. This take a lot of work and, over time, the essence of community begins to materialise.

Here is a challenge that many communities face: the lazy people don’t pull their weight so they fight with the busy people. We have avoided this on Five Streams by making everything voluntary (yes, you heard me correctly). Nobody has to do anything, because the farm has its own economy that runs whether or not the people contribute. Even if the people do nothing for the “we” the farm continues to develop, and all the people are able to share in the bounty.

Does this sound strange to you? Is it fair that they should take when they do not give? Well, they do give, that’s the point! They give because they are working on their own individual domains! That is why I say this to each new person that joins Five Streams: “Just focus on making your domain a paradise! If you do that, and nothing else, you will be doing a huge service to the community.”

Now comes the interesting part. Where the two circles intersect is where the actual “community” happens. This cannot be forced or planned. On one side we are developing the farm for all to share. On the other hand we have the individual domains. Where they intersect is the cause of some of the most awesome community experiences one can ever hope to be part of. They happen like little pieces of magic, often out of the blue. It’s fantastic! However, it is also the space that causes huge anxiety for some people. It is like trotting on a horse: if you get it wrong, it can be like Chinese torture, smacking your bum up and down over and over and over again, going nowhere slowly. If you get it right however, it is a smooth, lovely form of travel.

If you truly get what I’m talking about here, then you get what community, and Five Stream really is.

I hope you come visit us sometime. Having guests really supports us. See our website for details.

Scotty

PS. You may be asking “if nobody has to do any work, then surely nobody would do anything?“. That is precisely why we employ a team to make sure things get done, regardless. The idea is to make the farm so enticing and so attractive and so exciting that the people want to join in! They get involved in the “we” without wanting anything in return because their domain (the “me”) already gives them everything they need.